Searching for Love
Why as single mothers, are we hunting for someone to love us? How does that make sense, if God gave us a child or children who love us unconditionally? I’ve been going through many single parents’ forums and everything that I read is about the Ex that didn’t value their relationship or the new boo who only wants sex.
As a single mother, I don’t want to make the same mistake of choosing the wrong man again; therefore, I date men who are nothing like my ex’s to avoid that scenario.
Was he the one
If your Ex was not the one for you (he verbally abused you, wasn’t a good father, didn’t love you the right way) then why are you still giving him power over your life? Why is it important to find a man just like him or to get upset when he moves on first? Let him go and thank your lucky starts that you’re not with him.
What makes you shine
So many women have no idea who they are or their potential, without a partner. You where someone special before your relationship with a man or women. Why is it so hard for you to remember that? I know that getting your life back takes time, but you have to take baby steps to find your shine and not just find another relationship to hide in.
Wait to date
Wait before you date! Ain’t no one want your broken, rebound ass. After your relationship as ended, most of your conversation are generally about your Ex. Therefore, only start dating when you get more interesting to other people. If your family members or your friends are still rolling their eyes when you’re have a conversation with them, then you’re still not interesting and they might be tired of hearing what he did wrong to you.
Focus on your kids
I found that once I started to focus on my son and not my ex, my life improved immensely. I became more driven, and I found my “joie de vivre” again. My son was my rock and my driving force toward success. Yeah, my ex was dating and sometimes it hurt my feelings, but once I placed my focus on my son’s happiness and not my own I was able to let time heal my wounds.
Count your blessings
I thank God, every day that I’m not in those toxic relationships anymore. Were I don’t have to hide who I am from the world because my ex’s where insecure. Getting to wake up every morning and be a better mother than I was the day before. I treasure every moment with my son and my family. Stopping and counting my blessings as helped me grow immensely.
If one day a new man should come into my like, he will have to take us as we are and value us for what we bring to the table. But that is not my focus right now. Self-improvement is the name of my game currently. Therefore, take your spotlight off your ex and put it back on yourself. And if you’re not ready for the spotlight then shine it on your family.