Sugar in my coffee

A couple years ago I was having a discussion with my brother over brunch. A little background on my brother; he’s been in a relationship for a while and I thought he would be the best person to go to for relationship advice. Since you guys know I’m not very good in the love department. I was telling him about the ups and downs I was having with my now ex boyfriend.

He was puzzle; since he couldn’t understand why I was still staying in the relationship, even thought things were going south. In my defense I was a younger mother then and I truly believed that no man could ever want me, since I had a child and stretch marks. I know I’m not the only one who thinks these things. As a young single mom I believed that I had committed the worse crime and that I deserved deep down to be punished. Sad I know.

relationship advice

Well my brother was not having any of that. He said:”Renee, look at your relationship like these two cups of coffees in front of us.” He then put the bowl of sugar in the middle. He then said: “In a relationship the two people have a cup of coffee each and in an equal partnership the couple would share the sugar equally. But that doesn’t normally happen. A relationship is more about give and take. But if in the end one person takes all the sugar and the other person as none. Therefore one person’s life is sweet delicious coffee and the other person’s life is bitter coffee.”
Well I was taken aback, in this relationship I was in, I was doing all the giving and he was doing all the taking. I was sitting there complaining to my brother and my ex’s life was great. “Wow” I said to him “you’re not as stupid as you look☺”.

But he was right. I wasn’t getting what I needed from the relationship. I know that sometimes we as woman punish ourselves with bad relationship, after bad relationship. But his advice makes me stop and thing; is my coffee (relationship) sweet or bitter? I hope this can help you guys too.

Since no one really likes bitter coffee.



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